My Beautiful Idiosyncrasy
A sequel FROM THE BIG BANG THEORY
I started out taking photos out of Portland, Oregon. The imagery of landscape, people in action, businesses, and art. All of these things were not staged just raw beauty. I fell in love with shooting how I felt for the day. If I were feeling happy I would shoot sunny locations, people laughing, couples in love. When I was angry, I took it out on the world; shooting dark places I shouldn't be, homeless people, bum camps, pollution, and abandoned houses. I found my journal, camera, Mac, and a pen and I became at peace with myself again. I found a way to express life's problems.
I would go home and create a picture that the world could feel. Instead of a fabricated image that involves you feeling bad about yourself because you don't have that or look like that. For me, photography isn't just about creating perfect images because honestly, I am sick of the bullshit perfect world society has created. I am tired of being consumed to be perfect from head to toe. It is ok to have a fucked up life. That is where to beauty lies. The progression of media and its capabilities to make us feel inadequate is NOT OK! Be raw & real.
You would say I found my style with my emotions. I liked to create a spark of interest when people would look at my portfolios. A sense of a rebellious nature- I went into boudoir. I had amazing volunteers that would get naked for the camera and trust me through the process. It wasn't your ordinary boudoir of a woman taking sexy photos for their husbands. It was women in their everyday lives being themselves. It was extremely amateur, but it was part of my journey of discovering my style.I started reaching further and wanting more.
I started receiving offers from all sorts of companies to come and shoot for them, but I didn't take them. The companies were not what I believed in. I didn't want to stage a product, and I for certain didn't want to use 100lb models. It wasn't what I believed in and I didn't feel comfortable taking the offers. I then was offered a job to travel with a gentleman as he took classes all over the U.S. I also turned down the job because I soon realized it was a conceited act on his part to be somebody that he was not.
I moved down to Southern Oregon and started working with a company that had a vision as I did. A lifestyle that represented what the in and outs of living free is. To do and be who you wanted and to not let life get in the way. I took the job. I worked there for a good solid year. We created great imagery together, but I wasn't shooting as much as I wanted too as other duties were more important.
I turned 24 and societies perfect images kept haunting my dreams. I woke up feeling lost again... I didn't fit into this world and I was fighting it. My life wasn't together, and I felt like I wasn't going anywhere again. So I decided I needed a degree... I went off to school and forgot all about the photography life. Clearly, I fell into the traps of the world.
The opinions of the world shouted YOU NEED A DEGREE TO BE SOMETHING, TO BE SUCCESSFUL, AND TO BE COMPLETE.
... To be continued ...
Check next week to continue My Beautiful Idiosyncrasy